I’m sorry you’re going through grief. It can be a painful, confusing, and frustrating time. When I’m in a season of grieving for a loved one, I struggle to remember God’s love in the face of the difficult emotions I’m feeling. I need spiritual encouragement during grief when nothing else seems to help.

I have found solace in scripture time and time again. Here are some of my favorite Bible verses to help you find greater peace during the stages of grief.

Denial

“My heart is in anguish within me.
the terrors of death have fallen on me.
Fear and trembling have beset me.
horror has overwhelmed me.
I said, ‘Oh, that I had the wings of a dove!
I would fly away and be at rest.
I would flee far away
and stay in the desert;
I would hurry to my place of shelter,
far from the tempest and storm.’”
Psalm 55:4-7, NIV

It’s hard to wrap our heads around grief and loss, especially when it happens suddenly, or takes someone very dear from us. You don’t have to rush that feeling or try to force yourself to accept the death of someone you care about. Share your feelings with God in that moment by finding a verse like this one to meditate on.

Anger

“My eyes fail, looking for your promise; I say, ‘When will you comfort me?’”
Psalm 119:82

There have been times during my most difficult seasons of grief when others have promised God’s comfort is on the way. But I’m still angry about my loved one being gone.

If you’re angry, that’s normal. You can express your anger to God by using verses like this one in prayer. He will not abandon you or punish you for feeling angry, and you don’t ever have to be afraid to let him know how you really feel.

Bargaining

“‘Abba, Father… everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.’”
Mark 14:36, NIV

Even Jesus found death hard to face, and He prayed that God would take the cup of sorrow from Him. I hope remembering how human Jesus is and how much He was willing to struggle for us will comfort you and help you reach out for Him during the complicated bargaining stage of grief. He is always here, and He won’t turn you away.

Depression

“How long, Lord?
Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
and my enemy will say, ‘I have overcome him,’
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing the Lord’s praise,
for he has been good to me.”
Psalm 13

This short prayer from the Psalms is so encouraging to me when I am wrestling with depression, whether grieving or facing one of life’s many struggles. While happy words may not always be comforting, it is helpful to know that many other people have struggled with depression and have come to find hope during grief with God’s help.

Acceptance

“He says, ‘Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth.’” - Psalm 46:10

Acceptance is a difficult stage to reach, but it is possible. Give yourself time to accept God’s presence, even if you don’t feel it, during your time of grief. He has not forgotten you, and there are still many reminders around you of His love and mercy.

Even with encouragement like these verses, it’s still hard to find healing from grief. TheHopeLine is always here for you. We offer grief support through online mentoring and lots of other resources for coping with grief.

Talk to a HopeCoach if you’re grieving and need extra help. We know you can get through this, and you don’t have to face this alone.

We also have a partner, GriefShare, who is a caring support group of people who will walk alongside you through one of life’s most difficult experiences.

Helping a friend can be hard if you don’t know what to say when they’re going through a difficult time. If you need to help a best friend after a breakup, it can be hard to know where to start.

I’ve talked to many people over the years who have been through breakups. Though every situation is a little different, I’ve noticed a few healthy habits that can get you and your friend through this tough time together.

Listening Does Help

Sometimes the temptation is strong to want to make everything better for your best friend when they’re going through a breakup. After all, you care about them and want them to be happy and safe.

But true friendship isn’t about fixing all your friends’ problems. It’s about being present and being with them when they need someone to listen.

Listening doesn’t always feel like helping, but it does. It helps your friend feel less isolated, better connected to others, and more understood. Just being there is more help than you realize.

Encourage Self-Care

Healthy self-care is one of the best things you can do during a tough time, both for yourself and the person you’re trying to help.

Your friend is likely going through a lot of stress right now. And while you can’t force your friend to do what you think is best, you can encourage them in healthy self-care by participating with them. For example:

• Cook a healthy meal together
• Go to a tea shop and try some relaxing blends
• Spend time centering yourselves with deep breathing, meditation, and other physical activities that make you feel more relaxed.

Prayer can also help us find tranquility when we or others we care about are recovering after a breakup or other relationship difficulties.

It may help your friend for the two of you to pray together. But if they’re not ready, it’s perfectly fine to pray on your own and continue being there for them to remind them of God’s love in other ways.

Take Breaks When You Need Them

Even in the closest friendships, you need time to yourself to regroup when the person you care about is going through a breakup.

Your friend is going to be talking about some difficult things, and they’re going to be expressing a lot of upset feelings. It’s normal in those situations to feel overwhelmed and even a little frustrated. When times get hard, it’s good to take breaks to rest, spend time with family or other close friends, and to do things you enjoy.

If you’re still not sure what to do, even after taking some time to think things through on your own, don’t despair. Things are never hopeless.

We can help you work through friendship challenges without judgment. Talk to a HopeCoach at the TheHopeLine when you’re not sure how to help a friend going through a breakup. We’ll help you both get through this tough time while helping you keep your boundaries healthy and your friendship strong.

Is your friend wondering if they'll ever start dating again? Here are some things for your friend to start focusing on to help with the healing process. 

As you move forward in dating and relationships, it’s normal to wonder if you’re ready to get married to the person you love.

Every relationship is different, just as each person is different, so some couples might feel more ready to get married than others they know, even if they are all at the same age or stage in life.

What I suggest to each couple depends on their situation, their concerns, and their background. In general, it’s a good idea to consider a few things with your boyfriend or girlfriend if the two of you are considering preparing for marriage.

Are Your Expectations Healthy?

It’s probably no surprise to you that a real-life marriage is nothing like what we’re shown in the movies. One person cannot be our everything, no matter how much we care about them.

Marriage will not solve your problems, and it will not mean your spouse can solve all your problems, either. Before you get married, you’ll need to develop a healthy, balanced understanding of the struggles you each face and the strengths you bring to the relationship.

What Are Your Motives?

I know there is a strong social pressure to get married, especially when you have strong feelings, or you’ve been together quite a while.
But getting married isn’t about having kids, or having sexual intimacy, or moving up in life. Marriage is a profound act of service and sacrifice. It’s important to carefully examine what is motivating you and your partner to get married. If your focus is on the wrong place or on the wrong goal, your marriage will start off on shaky ground.

What Role Does Faith Play?

While God can work through any relationship, it is important to remember that marriage bonds you to your spouse physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Have honest conversations with your girlfriend or boyfriend about:

• Where you are in your faith journey
• If you believe in God (and what you believe about God)
• How your faith impacts your decision-making
• Where and how you will worship together
• How faith shapes pregnancy and raising children for each of you

Finding common ground in these areas is very important to center your relationship and understanding how marriage will change it as your lives change.

Have You Sought Counseling?

Pre-marriage counseling is required in many states before a marriage certificate can be issued. But it’s also a necessity if you want to be more certain that marriage is the right choice for you and your girlfriend or boyfriend.

Counseling gives you the chance to ask tough questions in a safe place. You won’t have to be surprised by your challenges and your differences if you’ve taken the time to talk through them with someone who is trained to prepare couples for marriage.

We’re here to help, too. Talk to a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine when you have questions about marriage, dating, and relationships. These are important steps to take, and we want you to have all the support you need.

Is it really love? Here are 15 characteristics that define a REAL mutually loving relationship.

Closer I Get to God, The Harder It Is 

Lorvena is struggling with pornography and it’s something she doesn’t want in her life anymore. She started looking at it, out of curiosity when she was 12 years old then it fed something in her. Lorvena explains that she’s been clean for about a week now and sometimes can go 3 weeks, but it seems the closer she gets to God, the harder it is. She recently got saved and baptized and thought everything would change. But as she’s been reading the Bible, she would still think about porn and watch it and then felt such a deep sense of shame. She constantly struggles with how to stop pornography addiction.

God crashed through Lorvena’s addiction for Christ to come into her life, but that doesn’t mean the spiritual warfare is less. As she found out, it can be more. As Satan had her in his grasp, he didn’t have to work very hard but now there is a war for Lorvena’s life.

Everyone faces temptation at some time or another, but the Bible says, “The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.” (1 Corinthians 10:13)

Peer to Peer: Lorvena Wants Your Advice on How to Stop Pornography Addiction

Lorvena is asking for advice and prayer. She wants to know if anyone else has overcome this and what have they done to do so. She wants to know, “Is this something I’m going to struggle with my whole life?”

Our community called in to give Lorvena some encouragement, support, love and ideas to help her with her addiction to pornography. Almost every one of them said they had their own struggles with an addiction to porn. Here’s what Audrey, Stephanie, Connor, Charity, and Preston had to say about overcoming an addiction to porn.

What God has Given You is Strong Enough to Overcome Your Addiction

Audrey says, “There’s nothing you can do to completely wipe this out, but every day that God gives you the opportunity to choose Him. That you make the choice to choose Him. The devil may bring that feeling to you of wanting to do something that you don’t want to do. Every day when you wake up, read your Word. “For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds.” (2 Corinthians 10:4)

What God has given you, is your faith, and what God has put inside of you is strong enough to overcome it. You are not alone. There is nothing wrong with you. God loves you. Your name is written on the palm of His hand and you’re important to Him. You can overcome it but choosing God, every day.

When Temptations Come, You Have Power and Authority in Jesus Name

Stephanie’s words are strong! She says, “I’m glad you are asking for help. It’s what the Lord wants us to do. The enemy tries to get us to be silent so he can kill, steal and destroy us. There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, but the enemy will try to make you feel as if you are not worthy. Where Christ is, there is liberty. You have been set free from these things which have you bound. When temptations do come, you have the power and authority that your Father has given you.”

Keep Submitting Yourself to God and His Word

Connor says, “I also got way into pornography and was hardcore addicted. I tried so many things to get free from it, like physical exercise, I tried to quote scripture, I tried to distract myself. Many of those things helped but none of those things could break the addiction. What finally broke the addiction was I continued to submit myself to God and His Word.” Connor shares Ephesians 5:26b, “Washed by the cleansing of God’s word.”  Connor says he has accountability partners who are peers, but he also has his dad as an accountability partner. Connor says to Lorvena, “As far as breaking the addiction, I couldn’t do it in my own strength. I tried and I tried, and I tried. I can relate to reading the Bible and as I sit there reading, my mind is wandering, and sex is dripping through my head. It takes that daily choice of I’m going to choose to love you God, even over my own desires. At the root of my issues, was pride and God took a 2X4 to my pride and a lot of things in my life changed. I submit myself to God and He set me free from my pride. I still face temptation, but now I’m at a point where I don’t have to give in. You have God, Himself, living in you and you have victory.

Tell the Devil, I'm Not Interested 

Charity says, “As your big sister in Christ, I’m going to give you some advice that will take you a long way in your walk with Christ. The devil is our enemy, and he would like us to believe that he’s complex, but the Bible let us know that he has only 3 weapons against us. I’m going to give them to you. From 1 John 2:16, “The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.” Whatever he throws at you, it comes from one of those. And every time you feel yourself about to do something against God, you tell the Devil out loud, “You are coming from the lust of the flesh…no thank you, I’m not interested. And get around people who are like-minded so they can help you fight. Then get into the Word and it will easier and easier for you.”

Get Rid of Easy Access to Porn

Preston says this is one of the most difficult things to overcome. He shares Matthew 18:9 “And if your eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than with two eyes to be thrown into the hell of fire.” Connor says, “If you are dealing with pornography, technology is a great asset to us but if it’s causing you to stumble. If you have to, get rid of it! You have a choice. Get rid of that which offends you. If you don’t have the avenue readily available to you, it’ll be more difficult to seek it out. Continue to read the Word. Satan has lost you so he’s going to continue to fight for you. Stay in His word, it’s sharper than any two-edged sword.”

Did Today’s Episode Get You Thinking?

I know this was a bit overwhelming for Lorvena but what amazing advice and encouragement from those who responded to her. I also heard a common theme in what everyone said…get in the Word of God and stay in the Word of God. Sometimes we forget how important it is but as God told Joshua in Joshua 1:8, “Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.” And as Preston pointed out, “The Word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires.” (Hebrews 4:12) We need to use the Word of God in our everyday lives to fight the battle against Satan. I pray for Lorvena. Lord, show Lorvena that you love her and cause her to be an overcomer and not just a survivor. Flood her with encouragement and prayer. Thank you that she had the courage to call in. Honor that! Amen.

Resources for Pornography Addiction:

Even though porn addiction is very difficult to overcome. You can do it. To start towards a porn-free life, download our free eBook: Understanding Porn Addiction.
Also, check out my blogs about pornography:

• Pornography Addiction: 6 Lies Pornography Tells Us
• 7 Steps Towards a Porn Free Life
• 6 Reasons to Cut Porn Out of Your Life for Good
• I Was the Good Christian Girl Addicted to Pornography

And my other podcast about addiction to pornography:

• Porn Addiction: How to Stay Away from Porn Permanently

Need to talk to someone? Chat with a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine.

One last thing,

My podcast, our website, everything we do is entirely listener supported. If you’d like to help us to continue our work, please make a gift right now at our Give Now page.

Remember, whatever you do, Never Lose Hope! 

How to Help a Friend Struggling with Addiction

I’ve talked with a lot of people whose lives have been impacted by addiction. It can be a roller coaster of ups and downs, depending on where someone is in their recovery process.

If you love someone with an addiction, one question is likely on your mind often: can I help? It’s natural to want to help someone you care about, and there are ways you can offer support. But it’s important to balance what you are able to do to show you’re in someone’s corner, and what is their responsibility.

Here are some ways I’ve seen people support friends and family in recovery while maintaining healthy boundaries.

Learn About Recovery

You’re already taking a great first step. Educating yourself about addiction and recovery can help you better understand some of the things your friend or family member is facing. Recovery is different for everyone, but your loved one’s journey likely follows a path others have taken.

It’s also okay to ask someone questions about their recovery. But I suggest keeping things general and letting them guide the conversation. Simply asking how you can be supportive will go a long way in making them feel less isolated.

Create a Safe Environment

One of the most difficult things about recovering after addiction is finding an environment absent of relapse triggers. Many social situations (bars, clubs, parties, etc.) encourage behaviors at the root of many people’s addictions. You can be a strong support to your loved one with addiction by creating an environment that avoids their relapse triggers. You can do this in a few ways:

• Trusting them when they say they need to keep their distance from certain people or groups of friends
• Have meals, parties, and social time without alcohol, or in places where alcohol is not served
• Letting your loved one choose times and places that support their recovery

Believe in Your Friend

Recovery can be very difficult for your loved one if they have to isolate themselves from the places connected with their addiction, or from the people with whom they used to engage in addictive behaviors.

Check in with your friend when you’re able to offer them a listening ear or a quiet place to recharge. Believe in them and their recovery. Pray for them when you think of it, and remind them of God’s love for them, no matter their past or present struggles.
Encourage them to celebrate the little things and remind them of what you love about them. You can’t take away their pain, but you can offer them comfort while they’re facing painful things, and that is something we all need from time to time.

Take Care of Yourself

Many of us who care for people going through a tough time tend to be so concerned for their wellbeing, we forget to take care of ourselves. Be sure that you don’t get too drained when supporting your friend in recovery. Take time to recharge by getting plenty of rest, nourishing yourself with healthy meals, and getting regular exercise. Give yourself a fun distraction from time to time. Go to a movie or do a hobby you enjoy.

You may also need extra support and guidance once you learn more about your friend’s addiction and have to watch them battle through recovery. It’s not easy. But it’s never hopeless.

At TheHopeLine, we’re here to listen and help you stay hopeful through challenging times. Talk to a HopeCoach when you need someone to listen. We’re here for you, and we believe you and your loved one can build a stronger relationship as they continue in recovery.

Being afraid to talk about addiction makes recovery challenging. If your loved one is afraid to talk about their addiction read this blog for advice on how to help them. 

I know the pain of losing a loved one or going through a traumatic, sudden loss like being fired or ending a relationship. All these things lead to grief.

And grief gets so intense sometimes, we just want it to stop. We start to wonder when and if grief ever goes away so things can get back to normal.

And here’s the tough part: most grief is grief because we know our lives will never be the same after experiencing this loss. In some ways, grief won’t go away entirely. After all, we’ve lost someone or something we can’t get back.

But healing from grief is possible, and you can still have a full, happy life that includes grief and loss.

Understanding How Grief Changes

A big part of coming to terms with grief is understanding how grief changes and recognizing when those changes come.

Everyone grieves differently. How your grief changes over time depends on things like:

• The nature of your loss
• How sudden or unexpected the loss was
• What your relationship with the person you lost was like

In general, the intense feelings of grief (crying spells, appetite loss, sleeplessness, and other ways grief affects your health), diminish over time. But grief is not a single story with one beginning, one middle, and one end.

Psychologist Collin Parkes says this about grieving: “As time passes the intensity and frequency of the pangs of grief tend to diminish, although they often return with renewed intensity at anniversaries and other occasions which bring the dead person strongly to mind. Consequently, the phases of grief should not be regarded as a rigid sequence that is passed through only once.”

You will go through phases of grief repeatedly. Knowing you can expect feelings to change but come back in different ways can help you find meaning and understanding when grief resurfaces.

Getting More Comfortable with Grief

Something that really helped me to deal with grief was understanding that it wasn’t something to be afraid or ashamed of. Grief is a sign of love and connection, so carrying grief is healthy and normal.

Becoming more comfortable with grief as an expression of love, rather than something to be “gotten over” may be a helpful step toward healing.

Centering myself emotionally and spiritually was important to finding acceptance. It helped me to know that God understands grief. He cares about me when I’m grieving, and He will never rush me into the next phase. Prayer, meditation, or connecting with a faith community where you feel safe can all be great sources of support as your grief changes.

Talking About Grief Over Time

People expect you to talk about your grief after the memorial service or in the weeks following your breakup or layoff. But it’s important for you to have people to talk to about grief well after the event passes.

Having ongoing conversations about how grief is affecting you helps to process your feelings and find greater peace. It can help to talk to people when:

• Birthdays or other important anniversaries happen
• When you see something that reminds you of the person you lost
• When a story or happy memory comes to mind
• When you are wondering what to do to move forward while still remembering your loved one

If you’re not sure who to talk to, reaching out to a HopeCoach can help. TheHopeLine offers grief support and resources to anyone struggling with grief. We are here for you and will support your healing however we can.

For more here are some healthy ways to experience and process grief that I hope will help you along the path to healing.

We also have a partner, GriefShare, who is a caring support group of people who will walk alongside you through one of life's most difficult experiences.

Having a broken heart can bring up a lot of difficult feelings. Through my radio show, I have talked to many young adults that are heartbroken and feel overwhelmed by how painful the circumstances are.
If you’re going through heartbreak, I’m sorry you’re hurting so much. I hope it encourages you to know that healing from heartbreak is possible, and that you can start taking those steps right now.

Why Does Heartbreak Feel So Overwhelming?

Heartbreak can put a real strain on our mental health, especially if we’re already living with depression or other diagnoses of mental illness.

Heartbreak might feel overwhelming if:

• You’re heartbroken after losing a loved one and having trouble dealing with grief.
• You dealt with numerous upsets either right before or right after the heartbreak, and you’re feeling especially vulnerable.
• You’re heartbroken because someone you love, and trust has hurt you deeply and unexpectedly.
• You’ve just broken up with someone you thought you would always be with.

The important thing to remember is that you don’t need to feel ashamed or guilty about these feelings. It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed by the feelings of shock, loss, and betrayal that are so often connected with heartbreak.
https://staging.wwwthehopelinecom.rackless.dev/can-broken-heart-physically-hurt/

Can I Stop Hurting Like This?

I want you to know that, as intense as your feelings are, and as valid as your pain is, it doesn’t have to last forever. And it doesn’t have to dominate your life.

One of the most effective ways I’ve found for healing after heartbreak is to think about how many people experience it. Virtually everyone past a certain age has had their heart broken. And while the situation that broke someone’s heart may always cause them pain, they’ve found a way to get through it.

Even the people you know that appear the happiest, the strongest, and the toughest have been through some intense loss and heartbreak. But they’ve found their way to the other side of the most overwhelming part. And you can, too.

Can I Heal Heartbreak Myself?

Doing anything completely by yourself may cause you to feel more overwhelmed than you were to begin with. But there are small steps you can take on your own that go a long way toward greater recovery after heartbreak:

• Committing to getting support: Even though getting support from someone who can help you does involve another person, the decision to get help is your own. Deciding to reach out for the support you need is one of the surest ways to make progress.
• Keeping the faith: It’s hard to believe that our faith can comfort us during a heartbreaking time. But the truth of the matter is, God is close to us in our heartbreak, and His power is greater than any situation or person that could overwhelm us.
• Enjoying little things: There are still things to enjoy about life, even during a painful time. Try to spend a little time every day doing something you enjoy or thinking of things you’re grateful for. It may be just the shift in perspective you need to give you the strength to keep moving forward.

Where Can I Start?

The first step toward healing is often the hardest, especially when we’re still reeling after a recent heartbreak. But you’re in the right place.

At TheHopeLine, we have ebooks, podcasts, and blogs to encourage people to stay hopeful. Or you can talk to one of our HopeCoaches if you need a listening ear. We’re so sorry you’re heartbroken, but we believe you can get through this. And we’re here to help, starting now.

If you’ve had your heart broken as a result of a failed relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re facing a lot of difficult thoughts and feelings.

One of the most common yet challenging struggles is the feeling of despair and loss of hope that comes after a breakup. It’s so hard to imagine not being frustrated or in pain that you find yourself wondering: Will I ever start dating again?

There’s no single approach to healing after a breakup, but with time, dating is possible. There are plenty of people in healthy relationships and marriages now who went through some serious heartbreak at other times in their lives.

Here are some things I suggest focusing your time and energy on as you engage in the healing process.

Practice Forgiveness

Forgiving someone after a breakup is no easy task, especially if cheating or cruel treatment were among the reasons for your breakup. But forgiveness is not only something you offer your former partner. It’s essential to forgive yourself.

Breakups and relationship problems can fill us with guilt and shame, which are often behind what makes us feel unlovable.

As you learn to forgive yourself, forgive your partner, and accept God’s forgiveness, you will find greater freedom, which will help you be open to the possibility of dating again in the future.

Remember, forgiveness is not about being okay with what happened, or letting things go right back to the way they were. You don’t even need to be in contact with someone in order to forgive them, especially if you feel unsafe around them.

Forgiveness and how it is practiced are different for everyone, based on the situation. Do the best you can and take things one day at a time.

Get to Know Yourself

When we lose a relationship, we are often left feeling like we’ve lost a part of ourselves. Breakups certainly change us, but they don’t have to change us for the worse.

The time after a breakup can be one of self-exploration and self-knowledge. Getting to know yourself is a great way to strengthen your character, rediscover your skills and talents, and build your self-esteem. All this will help you feel more confident and calmer when the time comes to start dating again.

Don’t Let Fear Win

Sometimes, when I’m wondering if things will ever get back to normal after a big disappointment or heartbreak, I end up getting in my own way. There are all these “what ifs” that keep me from moving forward.

It’s normal and healthy to have some reservations about dating again. After all, you don’t want to rush into a new relationship when you don’t feel prepared, safe, or comfortable with the thought of new girlfriend or boyfriend.

But don’t let fear win. Do your best to shift your mindset about dating. Think of it as a new opportunity to learn and grow, rather than a scary new frontier.

Bolster your courage with the support of a therapist, someone you trust in your faith community, and close friends who you trust to support you on your healing journey. As the idea of dating and meeting new people becomes more positive, you’ll find yourself less afraid, less despairing, and more prepared to enjoy dating again.

It can be intimidating to know where to start, or who to talk to. We are here for you. Reach out to a HopeCoach at TheHopeLine anytime you need support healing after heartbreak. We’re here to listen and support you in the important work of strengthening your heart and growing in your self-confidence.

Recovering from a breakup can be a long process, but it is possible. For more help read, How Long Does it Take to Recover from a Breakup?

You can’t separate your body from your emotions. What affects one affects the other. So, it makes sense that, even though heartbreak is emotional, we can still feel physical effects from the pain of a broken heart.

I’m sorry you’re going through such a difficult time. But I’m hoping that being able to identify what’s causing you pain and discomfort will help you talk about how you’re experiencing it in your mind and body so that you can find some relief.

Heartbreak Impacts Mental Health

Heartbreak is often connected with a sudden, unexpected loss:

• Loss of relationship: This is what we experience when going through a breakup
• Loss of intimacy: This loss of closeness with a friend can happen after a fight, or after a big life change like a cross-country move
• Loss of a loved one or pet: Few things are more heartbreaking than death and dying

Heartbreak isn’t just feeling sad for a day or two. You’re grieving what you’ve lost. That grief can cause:

• Feelings of depression, anxiety, or abandonment
• Difficulty eating or sleeping
• Anger
• Crying spells

Your heartbreak is unique to your situation. But take some time to think about how you’re experiencing it in your mind. That will make it easier to connect heartbreak with the physical pain going on in your body.

Mental Health Impacts Physical Health

All of that stress and strain is not going to go unnoticed by our bodies. When I think back on heartbreak I’ve experienced, I remember the pain of missing the person I cared about. I remember the exhaustion I felt. I thought I was never going to be able to get back to normal.

But our bodies heal. And our broken hearts can heal, too.

Recovering from Heartbreak: Start with Simple Self-Care

Psychologist Guy Winch has spent a lot of time studying the science of our emotions and how they impact our lives. When talking about healing from heartbreak, he often speaks of “emotional first aid”. Our bodies and minds need the same care, effort, and attention to heal during a difficult time.

Start with simple self-care routines to help your body strengthen and heal after heartbreak. Try things like:

• Snacking on fruit and vegetables (and drinking a glass of water) when you start to feel depleted.
• Moving and stretching your body throughout the day to stimulate blood flow, relax tense muscles, and keep your energy up.
• Going for a walk through your neighborhood. The simple act of getting out of the house for some fresh air can help you reset faster and focus on things outside your heartbreak.

As you make an effort to care for your mind and body, don’t forget your spirit. Even if your broken heart has made you lose faith, God is still closer to you than you know during heartbreak. Reaching out to Him in prayer, asking someone to pray for you, or going to a special place where you feel spiritual peace will make a difference.

Trust me, you will get through this. Healing a broken heart is possible. And if you feel overwhelmed, don’t worry. You don’t have to go through this alone.

TheHopeLine has the resources and support you need to talk about heartbreak in ways that help you find hope and healing. Talk to a HopeCoach when you’re heartbroken: they can help you make a plan for better self-care and a healthier outlook. Whatever you’re going through, we are here for you.

Looking for answers? Watch this video as a licensed counselor, Gretchen Lawson, answers the question, "How do I get over a broken heart?"